Celebri-spiral™: Enough Already

Our culture is in a celebri-spiral. We're conflicted over our ridiculous, growing celebrity culture consumption via magazines, websites, and TV shows. In 2007, my love/hate conflict made me take to the blog-o-sphere. All writing on this site © Dave Singleton 2009.

Thursday, March 8, 2007

March 8, 2007: She's Baaaaaaaackkkk....Star and Court TV Celebri-spirals

As if Nancy Grace, Larry King, and 80% of Court TV coverage doesn't already cover every celebrity legal spiral, now we have Star Jones in a new TV show, back to make sure we don't miss Paris Hilton in traffic court.

Yes, it's true. According to USA Today,
Court TV announced it hired Star to run a show about "criminal justice issues that intersect with the pop culture world. The show, which has no title yet, will likely start this summer or in the fall."

"The public is fascinated by the intersection of the legal world and the pop-culture world, and we hope to tap into that fascination as part of our overall strategy to broaden the appeal of the network's daytime lineup," said Steve Koonin, Turner Entertainment Networks president, in a statement.

Jesus, can you just see the lineup? Will Star roll out a red carpet in front of the courtroom? Will she borrow some Harry Winston bling for Lady Justice to dazzle? Will there be gift bags after every verdict?

This new Star vehicle makes me think of all the future celebri-spiral dramas acted out in courtrooms headed by cheesy second banana judges. Which celebrities do you think we can count on to "fascinate" us in what are sure to include these courtroom staples?

  • Paternity suit
  • DUI
  • Neighbor brawl
  • Traffic court
  • Aggravated assault
  • Suit against the National Enquirer
  • Club fight with Shannon Doherty and Lindsay Lohan
  • Strange death at the hands of washed up 60's or 70's star
  • Bitter divorce against cheating, no good celebri-spouse
  • Bitter divorce against gay husband
  • Custody battle
  • Stealing SWAG from a Golden Globes suite
  • Getting hit by a phone thrown by Russell Crowe
  • Getting slapped by Naomi Campbell
  • Beating the shit out of Virgie Arthur
  • Public lewdness that doesn't involve George Michael
  • Drunk and disorderly conduct
And will Star be the star of one her own shows?


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I want to beat the living crap out of Virgie Arthur. Will that land me on Star's show?

Thursday, March 08, 2007 9:20:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Clearly we know who the gay husband is...

Saturday, March 10, 2007 9:14:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Beating the shit out of Virgie Arthur....my guess is Chyna, the wrestling she-man.

Saturday, March 10, 2007 10:34:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't know, I am thinking some 70s sitcom star is gonna lose it at a spouse soon Like someone from Good Times or Maude. And then it will be the "Maude Murder," or something like that.

Saturday, March 10, 2007 10:39:00 AM  

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